I feel tired. Time flows like a honey. Every second is like a day. And every day is like a second. Time is nothing, it is just like a list of events, enlisted one after another on a roll of paper.

And there are coming the Elves - those little bastards, always stealing your will to live, your will to do anything.
You are defenceless against them. Nothing you can do will stop them. And, at some point you will get defeated.

I am lying on the ground of my room. I am laying in week old dust. Elves are around me. Everywhere. This is the end. Finally. They come to eat me, eat my mind, piece by piece, nibble there and there.

I am wondering. What are they? Why are they here? Why are they so small? And why is there so many of them. I am surrounded. I am drowning under flood composed of them.

Now, they have absorbed all of my will to do anything. They are nibbling. AAAH~

Well, I am trying to accomplish a lot. I am not sleeping very good. Ironically most of my precious time I spend chatting. I do not know why. I hate it. All those people writing to me, wanting some things - one wants chemistry protocols to school, another demands to know what am I doing. I can not say "You are disturbing me!" directly. I am trying to imply that they are disturbing but it looks like the do not want to notice or that they are too stupid to notice.

I am tired. My fingers hurt. My head hurts. My back hurts. My eyes do the same.
My productivity of this weekend is below zero.
I wanted to draw. I have drawn one bad picture. I wanted to watch some drawing tutorials - it has ended up in argue with my mother that kept disturbing me all the time.

It is nearly 11PM now. If I look back on the result of this day, I am disgusted. Less than nothing.

I have blabbered with few people, I have posted some posts to forums, I have checked different forums dozens of times. I may have practised my English a little. However I have nothing usable.

Now I feel burn-out from inside. I have lost my inspiration - and tomorrow is school, I still have homework to do - especially stupid one.

I want to draw something. I want to program. I want to analyse Silkroad (data) files. Well, that last point is more like nightmare at this point.

Anyway, before Christmas I had lots of ideas on drawings. I wanted to draw something Naruto related. I tried. I have drawn some Narutos but I have not finished anything. And most probably I will never finish it.

Last week I bought new aquarel pencils. I have not drawn anything with them yet. I paid a lot of money for them. Result? They are laying on my table. Untouched.

Whatever, I highly doubt anyone is going to read this. I even do not expect anyone commenting this. No one cares about me. Maybe it is better this way.